notes on the theme
my whole life i’ve held tightly to a youthful spirit and, many days, i‘ve wanted time to stand still in a way that i could relish in a moment forever. because he never ages, my mother used to call me ‘peter pan’. it was sort of a term of endearment when i was a teenager, but it turned to reproach when i was in my early twenties. i guess in her mind my attitude was naive, but i took her criticism as a compliment. why would i want to give away my life of adventure, creativity, and romance for the environment of anxiety, conformity, and materialism that so often plagues adulthood? as i got older, i wondered how i could evade the typical adult lifestyle and retain the sense of excitement and enchantment that is so often lost along the way. for ideas, i found role models who had been successful in living outside of that lifestyle. they weren’t necessarily people i admired in full (and some were probably terrible in some ways), but i thought if i could take at least a piece of their overall philosophy, i could piece together a set of goals and principles that would allow me to grow to live with the same idealism and integrity i felt in youth. i discovered that there are many principles you must cultivate in life—the seven most important are: you must travel, strive to acquire knowledge, exercise, retain modest desires for material goods, enjoy art and music, stay close to friends, and frequently interact with nature. //// i was fortunate to grow-up in a beach community that had a vibrant surf culture and semi-active punk rock scene—both of these were valuable influences in my life. surfing taught me to love being outdoors, love the ocean, and love the summer. punk rock taught lessons in non-conformity, anti-materialism, and, most importantly, how to stay confident in the pursuit of a lifestyle beyond the traditional american dream. //// the songs on this album reflect my thoughts, struggles, and successes in trying to define, redefine, and then live by this set of principles. with each step i take in life, i am still the same kid trying deep down to hold on to my idealistic view of the world. so with each step, i have to look to these principles to lead me. they provide the guidance and the motivation to keep me from standing still and push me forward again. //// something i’ve been thinking about recently that i’d like to add…in the past few months, i’ve seen a tendency for people to blame society or “the system” for the overall complexity of life. it’s obvious that the social/moral/political system we live under is broken. if you’re looking to find fault in the world, it will be easy to blame your troubles on some imperfection in that system. but this can be a trap. the system may be broken, but the world is beautiful and it’s your responsibility as a person to find this beauty and center your life around that. bide your time seeking knowledge, culture, and friendship. the corollary of this principle is to set your own expectations, define your own goals, and find pleasure in your own dreams.
daybreak
with daybreak, i saw new light on the horizon. in the darkness, each direction appeared the same, but the sun’s rays provided an option—i could now move towards the light or away from it.
forward again
forward again—i’m not turning from challenges now stirring or all of the lost dreams that got lost waiting for another day instead of creating, when i was evading my future. i think about my life, weigh my cares, and dismiss my apathy.
sometimes i get lost in wondering where my adult life will lead.
forward again—with my youth fading, i try to define a growing fixation. it’s hard to move on with unanswered questions. still, i open eyes to the ideal of progression.
i look in the sun…and this makes my world glow
chasing the night
i have a fear i can’t assuage of a chance i sense that slips away as we grow
to see the world chase our dreams; explore a life beyond the sea
adult responsibilities are taking my identity
will life pass by with us stuck here? i can’t wait another year—let’s go
we know that time won’t wait.
is this our one chance to escape?
grab my hand and run, leave your life undone
look into my eyes if you need strength
and in the setting sun, we’ll drive from wilmington on 17 to florida…chasing the night
all around me, life has changed, i can’t let go of the truths i shaped in youth
to fight my cause and never bend and chase the summer to the end of the earth
and feel the light…i’ve been searching my whole life
we know that time won’t wait.
is this our one chance to escape?
grab my hand and run, we’ll leave our lives for love
look into my eyes if you need strength
and in the setting sun, we’ll drive from wilmington on 17 to florida…chasing the night
i’m going to steal the future
i feel it stir inside—everyday i will try to write. something new. something to inspire a generation blinded my desire
i feel my heartbeat fast when i dream that i could change the world…that our lives could change the world…and that we could stay young, if we could stay…because i don’t want to say goodbye
i work; i reach to find a better way to live my life. and i must confess, that i know i could give more. i’d rather fight alone than live a lie.
i feel my heartbeat fast when i dream that i could change the world…that our lives could change the world…and that we could stay young, if we could stay young…because i don’t want to say goodbye
vim echo
the words echo clear in my mind, “come my new day”
for so long i failed to find the lines that shape
an image of self-progression with reason i found change, purpose, and a new direction
i am building, i am driving the world
with music, art, and knowledge
they animate my thoughts, emotions, and build dreams
they communicate new ideas
hopefully this will break what binds me…
dreams and visions
last night we built a fire and we spoke our philosophies
i swore i would simplify my life and my future
ignore the distractions from life’s growing complexity
that pull me away from what i want…can i find true love and a life carefree?
i wonder, as i define my place in society, will i stand strong in my convictions?
will i become what i swore i would never be?
will i stray from what i want? can i find true love and a life carefree?
will i find inspiration? will my dreams and visions take me?
will i find adventure? will my dreams and visions take me?
will i find self-expression? will my dreams and visions take me?
will i find wisdom? my dreams and visions make me whole.
the end of silence
silence has taken me. i keep trying, but i can’t speak.
and i feel i’m going to sink because for three years i’ve been asleep.
when i was gone, i felt i was crazy
can i stay strong? the future is hazy
for so long, i feel i was afraid
this is the end of silence and now i am free
sell your soul to the summer
it’s all i know
it’s all i dream
it’s all i feel inside
i’ve lost control
i’m losing sleep
i scream for help
but cannot seem to find why
will the summer come and rescue me
give me hope, bring me life
is this putting my life on hold?
I WANT TO FEEL ALIVE
i try to grow
i’m building strength
to find a fuel to ignite
this growing sense
of urgency
i’m reaching out
i want to see the light
will the summer come and rescue me
give me hope, bring me life
is this putting my life on hold?
I WANT TO FEEL ALIVE
i cannot wait. i’m sinking in summer lights and i’ve been up all night thinking.
i thought i’d let go of all my, my fruitless dreaming, but instead i’ve been thinking,
do not sell your soul to the summer.
unstill to focus
for some time, for so long i’ve been too unstill to focus on my future
out of step, overwhelmed, i have to chart a better course for my life
set sights to explore—to see the world and live within the moment
and i want culture—to meet different groups of people trying new things
i won’t follow a world so hollow
“i won’t give in” will be my anthem
should i write? should i call—to reach out to friends instead of disconnecting
despite blame, ignore fear. i’ll show dignity, respect, and self-reliance
wishful thinking, i’m not breaking. i think i’ve found clarity.
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